Now What? part 2, part 2

I read this in a book and I think it can be applied to everybody in all walks of life. It somewhat sums up mt last rant of a blog and really sounds a whole lot better than anything I've ever written.

"We both believe strongly that what we say about Jesus and the Christian life belongs, not in a private world, inaccessible and incomprehensible except "from faith to faith," but in a public world of historical and cross-cultural study, in the contemporary world as well as in the church."
-Marcus J. Borg & N.T. Wright from their book The Meaning of Jesus: Two Visions

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So the balls now in my court (as they say) but that's not where I like to keep it. It means that I now have to enact change instead of waiting for some invisible force to miraculously make things the way I want them. This is the part where I have to start challenging myself. I'll be 23 in September; I live at home, no job, and no car. What have I got to show for my life? Around here is when I start to feel depressed and my mind begins to wander and hope for that invisible force to come in and make things better. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen. I don't know what it is, its not that I lack motivation but it may be because I get let down easily. I can have 2 job interviews in a week and they go great but when I don't get contacted I seem to get set back. On a completely different note inspired from my roaming mind, there are times when friends ask me about girls and relationships pertaining to my life and the thoughts that go through my head are as follows. I've got character and I've some decent looks (or so I'm told) but again, the situation my life is in right now just doesn't warrant a relationship of that sort. It's not bad, it's just stagnant. I can't seem to get a job and that's just number one on the list. My life's not prepared for that right now, no matter how much I may want it at times. And I'm at that point in writing where I seem to have lost my place and wonder where I was going with this. The only thing I can do is push through. (If anyone has any ideas or suggestions please feel free to share them with me.) What else is there for me to do?
So God's apparently got this preconceived plan for my life but for some reason he doesn't enjoy sharing ideas as much as I do. At least right now he won't. There are times when I ask and many of those times I'm at peace because I know where I'm supposed to be. But it's the other times, those times when I've missed something or taken a wrong turn somewhere along the way but I don't know why or where. All I can seem to do is lay in bed at night and ask "Now What?" Where am I supposed to be going? What do I have to do to get directions? I've tried asking. And I almost always lose patience. (Don't you just love being able to answer your own questions without even knowing what you're doing?) Most of the time waiting means being patient and calming down and I think this writing helps me with that. I get time to focus my thoughts and reflect on what's been going on inside my head. But sometimes it still seems like I've been doing nothing. This time there is no complex conclusion. Sometimes in life you just have to wait.